I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
