Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Randomize
