Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
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