Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
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