he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
as a side note pls kill me
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
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