I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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