party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
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