you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
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