READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
Randomize
