North Korea, Best Korea!
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
I just found a bag of chex mix in my clutch
You were feeding it to the bartender last night
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
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