Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
