Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
Randomize