He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
my sisters under your porch take her home
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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