Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
