my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
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