Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
I smell like Dick and happiness
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
Randomize
