You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
