We're like a lot better than the average bears
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
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Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
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