i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
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