I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
Also, apparently I'm only coherent when I'm drunk sexting. And then I'm grammatically perfect and impressively eloquent.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Randomize
