Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
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