Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
Randomize
