I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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