sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
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