Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
Randomize
