Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
Apparently drunk me thought it was time for a career change. I woke up with a message from Mcdonalds saying that I was hired as the new cashier.
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
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