Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
Randomize
