Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
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