yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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