i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
jump out the window naked night went bad
Randomize
