That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
love makes seman taste better
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
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