.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize
