The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
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