I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
Randomize
