Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
