I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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