I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
Randomize
