I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Last night I had a dream we played Uno and had sex. You won at Uno, but you lost at sex.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
Randomize
