She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
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