i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Randomize