I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
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