Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Randomize
