he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
Randomize
