i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
Randomize
