we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
Randomize
