Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize
