Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
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