My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
i dont even know how to be here
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Randomize
