HIV tests are more positive than that guy
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
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