walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Randomize
